The Line at Baja Fresh

I eat lunch at Baja Fresh too often. It's terrible for you. But that's a separate issue. What fascinates me are the people you find in line during any given lunch hour. You'll most certainly get the guy ordering for the entire office, which is annoying. That person has been deconstructed by every stand up comic alive, so I'll assume you've heard a rant on that somewhere. The more interesting person is the guy or girl that sees Baja Fresh as a Mexican restaurant and tries to order their food using Spanish inflections such as "burrrrit-tos" and "enchy-lathas." God forbid they order a quesadilla. That person is better than the parent that can't control their kids. He or she is trying to order bean and cheese burritos while the kids are slinging jalapenos at each other. And just yesterday I saw a bone-thin girl order a tostada with no beans, rice, or meat (I live in California). I really love the person that is on the phone explaining the menu to people while they're at the counter. If you're back a few people, this is fine, but not while you're at the front. And, for the love of God, can you please at least pretend you know what kind of food Baja Fresh serves? "Oh, hey, the Baja Burrito sounds good, what's in that?" "Do you have anything besides beef or chicken?" "Does everything come with rice?" "Do you have something that's not wrapped in tortilla?" What the hell? It's a burrito and taco store. If you want a garden salad then go to Panera or something. Go eat a $5 foot long, asshole. Complaining that everything is so unhealthy at the register is useless. Get off your high horse and eat a fucking burrito for once in your life.

I feel for the employees. California is the land of finicky eaters, people allergic to absolutely everything. I can't imagine the requests they get. That is why I have a gameplan going in. I know what I want before I get to the counter. I order quickly and without hesitation. I owe it to them. And I don't want them to spit in my Mahi fish taco.